3 ways to retreat when life gets ugly  

Sometimes life just hits you between the eyes and you want to run and hide. Other times you feel like an eagle who is soaring over a great big city. You feel empowered and ready to tackle anything life sends your way. I choose to live empowered, but every once in a blue moon (no pun intended about blue) I just cannot get there. And I take it as a sign to stop and slow down. I think that maybe it is a warning that I have been going way to fast. Here are some ways to retreat when this happens to you.


Ways to retreat 

1. Grab some munchies and head to a place of solitude. 

I grab my bag of HONEY MUSTARD PRETZELS, a large glass of sweet tea and retreat. You could barricade yourself in your bedroom and turn off all the lights and sleep. Or you could watch endless hours of mindless tv. I know of a famous pediatrician who takes the day off and watches hours of Law & Order. And she doesn’t feel guilty about it. Folks, do what you need to do to save yourselves.

2. Take short breaks throughout the day. 

If I cannot get away I take short sections out of my day and quite my mind. I usually go to a park and take a walk/hike. A short walk outside even during the cold months can really boost your spirit/soul. A visit to a quiet library or museum could help you retreat. Take yourself on a picnic, grab some lunch and sit alone with your thoughts. This is also a good place to cry or talk to God.

One of my friends goes for a long run. This is how she gets “over” her blah days.

3. Plan a weekend getaway.

Don’t runaway from home, but run to a place where no one is depending on you for anything. I bet if you posted on Facebook that you needed a place to get some quite alone time for a weekend, you’d get some offers. 

How do you retreat?

What do you do when life gives you a knock on the head and you are worn out or emotionally crippled?

What gives you strength to fly again? 

We all have different reasons for retreating. Retreat when you need it, as long as you know it should have a beginning, a middle and an end.

If you are a Christian or Jewish, what sense of God do you have when you retreat? Commune with the creator of the earth. Seek Peace during your retreat. 


How do you know when the light comes back?

What is your sign that you are ready to enter back? For me it’s when I desire to enter back to the mundane and simple part of my life.  I start missing my family and maybe even the dog. Then I know, it’s time to re-enter the world. Everyone has a gauge. You will know when you know. Am I right?

Whatever your reason take the time this weekend and do just that. Slow down and do nothing.

Walk with your eyes wide open

Thought I would share a poem today on the Fabulous Friday. Most of us can relate to this poem. It is for everyman. It is for you, it is for me, it is for my neighbor.

brentwood life coach

It is an Autobiography in Five Chapters.

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I fall in.

I am lost…I am helpless.

It isn’t my fault.

It takes forever to find a way out.


Chapter 2

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I pretend I don’t see it.

I fall in – again.

I can’t believe I am in this same place.

But it isn’t my fault.

It still takes a long time to get out.


Chapter 3

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it is there.

I fall in…it’s a habit…but, my eyes are open.

I know where I am.

It is my fault.

I get out immediately.


Chapter 4

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I walk around it.


Chapter 5

I walk down a different street.



We do not have to repeat our same patterns. We can break free and live differently. We can be overcomers. We can move on and leave bad patterns behind. We can live triumphantly and in peace. Do what you do with your eyes wide open.

Please enter the discussion about this poem below in the comment section.

Life gets easier with these tips

Everyone has something that makes their life easier, a trick or gadget. Something that changes the way they live and work. As a wife, mother, and full-time cook, I have a few tricks (hacks) up my sleeve that I would like to share with you.

allthingsgoodandwise, pinterest,


Life gets easier with tip #1:  As I ran into the kitchen this morning to grab a quick breakfast, I saw my stack of paper boats and did a little happy dance. These paper boats are the bomb. They are multipurpose and I use them all the time. I use them when I need a small bowl to keep chopped veggies separated, serve small breakfast on the go, warm up leftovers in the microwave, portion out a few chips for a late night snack or to use with small paint and craft projects. Buy these now because your life is about to change. (wink)

Brown Paper Food Trays | 50ct


Life gets easier with tip#2: I have a love, hate relationship with my round whisk. I know that it does a great job and that my BFF “best baker ever” Joy says it’s her favorite utensil, but I just don’t like it. Especially now since I fell hard in like with my FLAT WHISK. The whole flat thing makes it so much easier to whisk things and make gravy things. Try it. You’ll like it. Mine is very similar to the one below.
WMF Profi Plus 12-Inch Stainless Steel Flat Whisk


Life gets easier with tip #3: Most of these Life gets easier tips come from my problems that need to be addressed. Like my love for block cheese and my hate for that shredded cheese stuff that has a funky film on it and doesn’t melt to my liking. So the solution is to buy block cheese (what I like to call real cheese) and shred it myself. Thing is that I am lazy when it comes to using the grater. So one day I decided to use my salad shooter. I mean it worked with hard veggies, it should work. And it did. I have been grating hard cheese with my salad shooter for years now. I thought everyone  knew about this but me until I shared it with a group of great cooks. They had no idea. This is the best thing since sliced bread. You must get one. It will make your life easier, I promise. I am certain you can find one of these at the next yard sale, still in the box. It’s where I bought mine. But if you don’t find one or want one right now, try this link below.

Presto 02910 Salad Shooter Electric Slicer/Shredder



Life gets easier with tip #4: Lemon squeezer. I don’t think this needs any explanation. Just look a it. It is a work of art. A Kitchen Utensil Art.

New Star Foodservice 42856 Enameled Aluminum Lemon Squeezer, Yellow

Life gets easier with tip #5: This item helps me eat healthier. IT takes away the reason for not taking a salad to work or while I am on the go. It has a special compartment for the dressing. That’s my favorite part. I will say that if I know I will have a table to eat on that day I will take one of my paper boats or a paper plate with me to spread out the salad. I shake the salad dressing on it first and then pour out a little at a time. This little thing is a Major Time, Money and Extra Weight Saver.

Ramini Brands Fresh Salad To Go Serving Cup – Bonus Recipes – Salad Shaker With Dressing Container Fork – Set of Two


As you can see, I love everything that saves me time and energy. Here are some fun items that are on my wish list.

Evriholder Cutlery Cleaner, Green

Magic Sealer

OXO Good Grips Corn Peeler

I could go on and on!!!  What are your Life gets easier with tips?  Have a Fabulous Friday!!!











Forget about the Dress

Yes, I got sucked into the whole what color is the dress thing too. Who cares? I do, I am fascinated as to why people saw colors that I didn’t see. However, I did take a break and then saw exactly what they saw. Two totally different colors! I couldn’t believe it. Was it their convincing comments or was it my mind just “going there”? Is that why I was able to see two different colors in that dress?


I enjoyed reading this article but it didn’t quite hit the nail on the head for me.  I think because aside from what color the dress really is, I found myself discussing something trivial with my family, friends and seems like the whole world. Sometime we need to shoot the breeze about nothingness. Sometimes it’s not about the problem but the fact that you have opened up a line of communication between two human beings. There were looks, there were smiles, there were surprised huffs, there were stares and there was communication. We were all trying our cases. I loved it.

As I sat and watched my kids, my husband and everyone else discuss the color of said dress, I was overjoyed at the fact that we were all connecting.

So, I soon forgot about the dress and just enjoyed the ride.

5 Tips to Goal Setting

Many times I get asked to explain how to set goals and keep them. So I thought I would share some tips with you. Goals are set when you wish to reach for something is important to you. If it is not important then you don’t give it much thought. You may want to quit smoking or quit a bad habit because you know it is wrong or harmful.

Brentwood Life Coach

Goal setting helps you take control of your life’s direction. It gives you a measuring stick for determining whether you are actually succeeding. However you need to know how to set these goals. You can’t just say “Hey, I want to have $5,000 dollars in the bank by next year. It is a process that begins with great planning and consideration of what you wish to achieve. It ends with a lot of effort and hard work. In between you have specific and well-defined steps to get you to the prized goal.

Ask yourself some of these questions when setting a goal.

1. What motivates me?

2. What will achieving this goal bring me?

3. What obstacles might get in my way?

4. What can I do to remind myself daily of this goal?

5. Who can I share this goal with that will be a support to me and cheer me on?


  Keep in mind that having a plan is important and here is a template for setting goals.
SMART Goal Template
Specific: Make your goal clear and well-defined.
Measurable: Include precise dates, amounts and other ways that will confirm that you have made it.
Attainable: Make sure you can attain this goal. Don’t reach too high but choose one that is too easy either.
Relevant: These should be relevant to the path you wish to take life and career. Stay focused.
Time-Bound: Set a deadline for these goals. Goals must have a beginning and an end.
You have your homework now. Using the above tips, write your goals out today. And then the rubber will meet the road and you will have to work hard to achieve these goals. GET GOING!!!

Song of Soloman: Better than Shades of Gray

This shades movie is causing quite a stir these days. But I doubt that this is the kind of sex ed our society needs. I mean really? Where is Gloria Steinem when you need her? We women are not to be in bondage, WE ARE TO BE CHERISHED!

allthingsgoodandwise, 50 shades of grey, Intended for pleasure, song of solomon

I’d like to share some alternatives to reading these books or watching the movie.
Song of Solomon: The 22nd book in the bible is series of lyrical poems about a young woman and her lover. These poems are filled with physical love, and even erotic love.  The words are very descriptive and romantic clearly describing passionate love between a bridegroom and his bride  who are deeply in love.

Here is an outline of the book:

Song of Solomon 1:1-2:7 – The bride expresses her deep desire to be with her lover and sings praises about him.

Song of Solomon 2:8-3:5 – The affections between the bride and her lover becomes more intimate, and she pours out more praise on the one she loves was very elaborate and exquisite analogies from nature.

Song of Solomon 3:6-5:1 – King Solomon gives his praise, as does the bride, and the engagement takes place.

Song of Solomon 5:2-6:9 – The bridegroom goes away for a period of time, and during his absence the bride longs for his return and continues to give him praises.

Song of Solomon 6:10-8:4 – This section contains some very descriptive verses describing the beauty of the bride.

Song of Solomon 8:5-14 – The conclusion deals with the durable eternal bond of consummated love.

For further study I suggest this sermon series/study by Tommy Nelson called Song of Solomon

If you happen to be an engaged couple I recommend reading Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage

This is a great book to give to a married couple as well. I think I still have my copy from 1990. It has been around for a long time (30 years I think). Just so you know, it has graphic content. But well worth the investment for those who are interested in being fulfilled in this area.

Hope these will be good alternatives for you to explore.




My heart prefers only one

Sometimes life is so busy that you must trade one thing for another. You must sacrifice your every week blog posting for family and greater things. That’s what happened to me this week. I apologize for being late to the party on Friday. My life has thrown me some curve balls and I am forced to let some things go and concentrate on the things that are tug at my heartstrings.

One man and one woman, ALLTHINGSGOODANDWISE

My son, my daughter and my husband are the ones who get first dibs on my time. Aside from spending some peaceful and searching times with my creator, they take precedence over other things. I prefer them over most things in life.

When my husband and I married we told each other that we would prefer each other over anyone else. I love what gotquestions.org has to say about this:

“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Genesis 2:24 KJV). Other translations render “leave and cleave” as “leave and be united” (NIV), “leave and be joined” (NASB), and “leave and hold fast” (ESV). So, what precisely does it mean to leave your father and mother and cleave to your spouse?

As recorded in Genesis chapter 2, God created Adam first, and then Eve. God Himself brought Eve to Adam. God Himself ordained that they would be joined together in holy matrimony. He said that the two of them would become one flesh. This is a picture of marital intimacy—the act of love that is never to involve anyone else. To “cleave” means “to adhere to, stick to, or join with.” It is a unique joining of two people into one entity. It means we do not quit when things are not going right. It includes talking things out, praying things through, being patient as you trust God to work in both of your hearts, being willing to admit when you are wrong and asking forgiveness, and seeking God’s counsel regularly in His Word.

If either spouse fails to both leave and cleave, problems will result in a marriage. If spouses refuse to truly leave their parents, conflict and stress result. Leaving your parents does not mean ignoring them or not spending any time with them. Leaving your parents means recognizing that your marriage created a new family and that this new family must be a higher priority than your previous family. If spouses neglect to cleave to each other, the result is a lack of intimacy and unity. Cleaving to your spouse does not mean being with your spouse every moment or not having meaningful friendships outside of your marriage. Cleaving to your spouse means recognizing that you are joined, essentially “glued,” to your spouse. Cleaving is key in building a marriage that will endure hard times and be the beautiful relationship that God intends it to be.

The “leave and cleave” in the marriage bond is also a picture of the union God wants us to have with Him. “Ye shall walk after the LORD your God, and fear him, and keep his commandments, and obey his voice, and ye shall serve him, and cleave unto him” (Deuteronomy 13:4 KJV). It means we leave all other gods, whatever form they may take, and join to Him alone as our God. We cleave to Him as we read His Word and submit to His authority over us. Then, as we follow Him closely, we find that His instruction to leave father and mother in order to cleave to our spouse is to discover commitment and security, just as He intended. God takes His design for marriage seriously. Leaving and cleaving is God’s plan for those who marry. When we follow God’s plan, we are never disappointed.

Read more: http://www.gotquestions.org/leave-and-cleave.html#ixzz3R5iPSy4V

So as we approach the day of hearts, love, lovers, unions, and preferring one another over anyone else I wanted to affirm my union with one man, my husband.

Please share your thoughts on love and unions freely.