Author Archives: allthingsgoodandwise

About allthingsgoodandwise

Living Life for all things Good and Wise.

Go Ahead, Share your Story

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Today started like any other day except that I pushed myself and got up and dressed extra early to fit a work out  in before my work day began.  As I entered the gym I ran into a new friend in the lobby.  We began talking about what we had in common and what we type of exercise we do when we come to the gym.  I  shared what classes I like to attend and what I normally do  for a work out? However,  I conveniently left out how often I come and how long I actually work out.

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As our conversations moved onto more personal information about ourselves and we realized that our lives had taken similar paths. Some of the paths were filled with hardship and pain. Hurtful experiences that we had not planned on sharing with a new friend in the foyer of our local gym. However, we both chose to open our souls, just a bit, and share our stories.   In the end it was both therapeutic and empowering.  More of these kinds of encounters are needed in this world.  Sharing our lives with each other, the hurt, the pain, the sometimes uncomfortable and the disappointments all can be used for good.  Somehow as these stories are shared with another they become a teaching tools, testimonies, overcoming triumphs, and they put feet on GRACE and MERCY.  If you do not know about Grace or Mercy, or if you have never heard of these words, leave a comment or message me.  I would be glad to share what I know about Mercy and Grace.

 

I challenge you all to bare your souls. We cannot share our stories with everyone and not everyone needs to hear them.  But you will feel a nudge and a green light to express what is in your heart with others.  You never know what may come from this conversation.

Taking the Day Off

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Sunday is Mother’s day and this mother needs a day off.

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I will

take the time to see my children’s faces and drink in their smiles.

take a nap without a care.

forget about my fitness pal and enjoy my Mother’s Day lunch.

take a walk around my garden and dream.

and call my momma and thank God she is healthy and well.

I love that this holiday is one where every one is a participant.  Either you are a mother and/or you have a mother (earthly or heavenly), so everyone celebrates. What will you do this mother’s day?

Fabulous Friday: Taking Grace and Mercy by the Hand

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Oh gosh, have I messed up some stuff in my lifetime.  Everything from small mistakes to huge (tragic aftermath kinds of) mistakes. I often wondered how I could change the way I viewed them when I looked at my past.

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Here is what I learned.

Making mistakes is all part of living in a less than perfect world.

We all make errors from time to time.

Some of us make big life changing uh-ohs and then others make lots of small mess ups that in the end add up to a huge disappointment.

We should not dwell on our mistakes.  It is not productive.

But I needed more ammunition to blast my blunders far away. I needed to do something productive with my memories and past goof ups.

Mistakes are plentiful in everyone’s life, but it is what we do with the mistakes whether we or not we carry them with us.

We should leave them behind (can’t change the past) and climb over them to get to our goals and dreams.

Dave Ramsey says that successful people “have made mountains of mistakes in the process of becoming successful.” “The gleaming mountain of success is actually a pile of trash — a pile of the mistakes we have made.  The difference between the successful and the troubled is not error-free living; it is that by discovering and implementing a life calling, the successful stand on their pile of trash while the troubled sit under theirs.”

Be the one who climbs to the top of their piles of mistakes.  Push them forward to overcome and succeed.  Don’t wallow in the disappointment.

If you have made mistakes this week, you get a do over, starting now.  Push it on the heap and triumph over it all.  Start the weekend with a clean slate and take grace & mercy by the hand.

My ordinary “gray” days

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Last week a book I was reading talk about an “ordinary gray day”.  It made me stop in my tracks a bit. Mostly because sometimes I feel like I have an  ordinary gray life.  I don’t feel like my days are all that special.  I go about my work and do my thing. But the days seem normal and ordinary.

I looked up the word gray in the dictionary. It said “Lacking cheer or brightness in mood, outlook, style or flavor; dull in color; having an intermediate and often vaguely defined position, condition, or character”  Yes, yes and yes, that sounds just like my day/life.

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But when I see my friends lives I think of how exciting and fulfilling their life must be.  Of course the “grass is always greener…”  The more I pondered the more I began to see that my life/days aren’t lacking in cheer or style. And they are not dull at all. What I was looking at that made my life seem so ordinary and gray were my surroundings.  But I began to look at the people in my life and found it all to be very wonderful and not so ordinary. My sweet son who smiles at me every time he sees me. My strong husband who wraps his loving arms around me every day.  My precious daughter who loves me unconditionally.  My friends who call and share in my joys. My family members who look forward to visits and phone calls. They make my life very extra ordinary.

So I challenge you today, to stop and take a good look at your life and see that your life is very unique and beautiful.

Fabulous Friday: Let’s go to the Movies

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Don’t know why it is but every time it rains I get the urge to go to the movies.  Maybe it is something from my childhood, who knows. I enjoy seeing a good movie but I usually get a video/dvd and watch them at home. It is rare that I actually see a movie in a theatre. But when it rains, that dark room filled with popcorn smells calls my name.

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Love that entertainment has a way of taking you away from thinking of your troubles and worries. It lets you escape your life for a couple of hours and sometimes that is just what the doctor ordered.  I think back on some of my trying years with heartaches or disappointments, and taking a break from it all was such a relief. If just for a couple of hours, life was fun and I laughed (I prefer comedies over tragedies).

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FYI: Did you know that the correct spelling according to the National Associates of Theatre Owners is T H E A T R E and not theater.

If you get a chance this weekend watch a movie or go to the theatre, do it.  I challenge you to put down the worries of your world, sit down and laugh, cry and smile.  Would love to get suggestions on your favorite movie.

My Life in Trimesters

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This past weekend I had dinner with my friend Jamie, who is 4 months pregnant.  She let me know that she feels so much better now that she is in her 2nd trimester. “That first trimester was rough filled with morning sickness and fatigue.” I let her know that you feel so much better in the second trimester and the third is usually filled with lots of energy and the stamina needed at the time of delivery. Trimesters is a division of a period in three sections. So as I pondered the cycle of life in utero I thought of our lives as women.  As a woman my life has played out in three very distinct phases/trimesters.

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During the first trimester of life I was young and I filled my days with school, college courses, graduations and then began a career. The next trimester I married and filled my time with taking care of my husband, my children and building a home.  Now that my children are grown and don’t need me to be at their beck and call I am free to focus on my last stanza in life. Not saying that the end is near but that I am entering a new journey.

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But like many women that find themselves in this phase of life, questions rise to the surface. Tough questions that are in need of answers.

Who am I now that I am not a mother of young children?

Do I still want to pursue the same career path I’ve been on?

What mark do I want to leave on this earth when I am gone?

What will I do if I don’t want to go back to work?

Now that I can focus my undivided attention on something, what will I focus on?

Should I go back to school?

What is my purpose in life?

The nest is empty, now what?

The “now what” phase can be a bit paralyzing sometimes.  In one single car ride you drop off you last son/daughter at school and enter into a whole new era. It can be overwhelming and you might get stuck in that time zone for a while.  That is ok, you will need some time to process it all. Once you have moved past this time you are ready to begin your new trimester.
Here are some suggestions on how to begin your journey:

Speak up: Ask those close to you to tell you where they see your gifts and strengths. Begin by asking those whom you respect and admire, a close friend, your husband, your bible study leader or a close co-worker.  Write these suggestions down and compile a list.

Spend time in Prayer: Giving it all over to our creator is a step not to be skipped. Only He can give us the comfort and peace to continue on during any life changing event. After you have laid it all out, you can begin to petition your desires. Ask him to lead you and give you wisdom to make good choices. Ask him to give you a heart like His.

Step out: Begin by pursuing avenues of interest.  Follow leads and paths that interest you.  You will find that some will be closed doors but then others will be open doors. Some will lead you to other paths that will surprise you. Do not be stagnate, venture out and seek what brings you joy and peace. Remember that nothing ventured, nothing gained.

I wish the answers to the above questions would magically appear or that I could spell out the answers for you in this post. But I cannot, however, I do know that living our life in real time is our ultimate goal. I am reminded of a song that says “ain’t about how fast I get there, ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side.  It’s the climb.”  Every stage in life, first, second and third trimesters it is all about the climb.

These things will never change

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A young couple  and I were talking in the foyer after church service one Sunday.  We were talking about jobs and where they were living and how everything was wonderful.  They were newlyweds.  ”Ahhh newlyweds, I thought to myself, what a wonderful time in a person’s life.”  I shared in their excitement for life and that I too remembered our years as newlyweds.  ”Life is wonderful, new, invigorating” I said to them.

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I know they must have seen that wonderful twinkle in my eye, to which the newlywed husband said, well you talk about it like it is all gone now and not as exciting.  I stopped and said, well yes, it is over, the honeymoon is over and we have bills to pay and tuition to pay.  Life is not the same as it was the year we were married, we have a mortgage, a kid in college, huge responsibilities with our jobs and we are older.  All of that on top of the fact that we know each other very well now. These words now haunt me because I wish I could have elaborated with them about the things that are more wonderful now than they were then.

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The things that will never change is the fact that when I talk about my husband I still get that weak in the knees feeling, the assurance that our love is just as strong (if not stronger) as our first year of wedded bliss. I think of the many laughter sessions we still share that has kept us from staying mad at each other.  The list could go on and on about the things that will never change no matter how long you are married.  That honeymoon stage is wonderful and should be treasured, but being married a couple of decades also has its perks.

Fabulous Friday: Curiosity

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Curiosity might have killed the cat but it also gave us many discoveries and inventions.  Electricity , penicillin and caviar (who would have thought to eat fish eggs).  When we stop being curious and keep to a mundane life you start to lose something.  I heard this week that most men die at 25 but are not buried until they are in their eighties.  They die with the song still in their pocket.  Release!  Release your curiosity and do something you have been afraid to do in the past.

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Curiosity led those men and women to find wonderful things that we now use daily and enjoy.  Curiosity led this man to make a work of art when he was out of work and now his art is on display in a museum. Taking a risk when there was nothing left to do led him to realize a dream.

If you could do anything, knowing that you would succeed, what would you do? Think about that and write it down. Take it and make a plan, even if you begin with small baby steps. Step one is always the hardest. So what if it takes a long time to accomplish your goal.  You will enjoy saying that you are in the process, believe me.  ”I am working on my masters.”  ”yes, I really need to go back and get my masters degree.”  Pick one.

If you need to start small then go with your curiosity this weekend and do something you’ve never done before.  Take a different trail on your hike, explore. Or try something out of the ordinary when you cook this weekend.  Curiosity should be a welcomed experience.

Human Sacrifice: Good Friday

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Human sacrifice was practiced by many ancient cultures. People would be ritually killed to please or appease a god or spirit.  The Aztec practiced this in an unusually large-scale; they sacrificed every day to help the sun rising. I feel a bit guilty since I am from Mexican descent; and my ancestors participated in this massacre.  The Greeks, the Scandinavians, there is evidence also to suggest Pre-Hellenic Minoan cultures practiced human sacrifice. The Arabic culture sacrificed as a ritual in the Fesitval of the Sacrifice, they sacrificed an animal that was healthy and conscious. They then divided the meat into three parts (which I find very fascinating). The first goes to the sacrifice, the second to their relatives and the third to feed the poor.

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The lamb was the principal animal of sacrifice among the Jewish people at the evening and morning sacrifice in the first century AD.  These sacrifices usually took place around 9am and then the lamb was slaughtered around 2:30 and then laid on the altar around 3:00pm in the afternoon. The lamb without blemish, in other words a lamb that was near perfect.  The fact that we as humans have always sought to make a sacrifice,and a near perfect one at that, points to the need that we all have for an atonement.  Atonement meaning a reparation for a wrong or sin.

I’d like to share with you about the sacrifice that put an end to all sacrifices. Jesus was slain on that 12th hour (3pm in our day).  He was without blemish, he was conscious.  He knew what he was about to do and did not fight to escape what was about to take place.  Don’t you find that odd? Here are some other odd things that happened on that day.  An earthquake, an eclipse and a curtain that ripped from top to bottom in the temple. Wow, what a day! But what sets this sacrifice apart from all the others is that this sacrificial lamb rose from the dead after 3 days.  He returned from the dead to walk on the earth again.  No other god, sacrifice or religious leader rose from the dead.

So even though this was a very sad day because Jesus was crucified, Sunday is coming.  Sunday was the day he rose from the dead to become our savior once and for all.

Fabulous Fridays: Mothers and Goodbyes

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Saying goodbye is the highlight of my morning.  Mostly because I get a huge hug and a peck on the cheek from the sweetest boy I know.  He sometimes gives me what he calls his Anaconda squeeze and I pretend that it was way to tight.  But I secretly love every second of it.

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As a mom of one child who has gone off to college I now realize that these precious moments will soon go away and I will be left with memories of what used to be.  So I will take these goodbyes in person because before long these goodbyes and hellos will be over the phone or by Skype.  They will not be in person.

Taking every memory and storing it away for those days when my job as a 24/7 mom is over.  They will serve me well when I become that part-time mom of grown children.

Take those goodbyes and savor them today.